Tuesday, June 06, 2006

this is a litle tale about sleeping

once, long ago, a whirling bit of cosmic dust, an almighty deity, or some cosmic accident resulted in this thing we know as humanity. whatever our origin, us bipedal primates were designed to spend half of our lives sleeping.

indeed, the bed is the great equalizer; even honeymooners and dudes on death row must sleep.

finding this sleeping business a bit tedious (and an utter waste of time), beth, angie, and i planned our escape. we traveled deep into the sun soaked land of mexico.

once we reached the coastal village of yelapa, we sidestepped the bed bugs for an hour or so by joining a candle-lit dance party. the locals were a peculiar blend of hippee, tourist, and native, but the dj's fondness for cheesy eighties music made us retreat to our jungle bungalow.

and it was there that we succumbed to that inevitable sign of human weakness--we slept.

like any holy grail quest, our search was in most ways a failure. despite its two dollar margaritas, roaring iguanas, and tropical beach, yelapa could offer us no antidote to the night. still, our sleep was far from boring. as you may or may not have noticed, these beds are covered in netting AND, better yet, they hang: we were safe from all those nasty jungle critters while hanging suspended in mid-air. it was as if the bed itself was a physical representation of our sleep state; that night we hovered happily in our dreams. how can sleep get cooler than that?

(it can't.)

1. what if we're stuck in seattle? should we avoid the boredom of sleep and advocate our friends and roommates to do the same?

2. speaking of roommates, what is one to do if his (or her) roommate serves as a roadblock for this pursuit of waking life? for example, let's say that at 9pm someone intends to delay the call of sleep by watching a hit tv show (e.g., 24) with his girlfriend, but that his roommate says, "no, i have to work early in the morning; i'm going to bed now, and the tv is too loud." what should one do?

3. okay, okay. so assuming that one does the polite thing and lets his or her roommate drift safely to sleep, what if the roommate also says "yep, i've decided that i need more sleep, i'm gonna start going to bed about this time every night. maybe you could use the tv friday nights..." what now? sure, mark needs his sleep, but what about my right to occasionally watch a movie on my big screen tv?

(i was going to ask a sex question related to hanging beds, but then i remembered that i was annoyed about our small house, so alas, i asked no sex question. now it's too late.)


Anonymous said...

Post more of the Orange Kitty!

Mer said...

Actually, I think the average person spends about 24 years of his or her life asleep....I think it's more like 1/3 to 1/4. :)

The Ruiner of All Things Fun said...

Yeah, if you think about it: 8 hours per 24 hour day works out to a nice 1/3 but you may miss some every now and then (Your roomate could be watching the last several episodes of 24 Season 3 in the next room, for instance) so it's inbetween 1/3 and 1/4 of your life. And good gravy, how could our house being small not let you ask your naughty questions?

andrew said...


errrrrrr...i'm a little disturbed by your link. still, i'm hopeful that you're actually referring to content on this blog (http://the17pointscale.blogspot.com/2006/05/real-life-gets-in-way-of-blogging.html). if so, i'm sorry but those are the only pics i got of the orange kitty. there were many stray cats in yelapa, so i limited the exposure of any one feline.


i really can't argue with you. you're right! i either spaced about this one or opted to go for the less precise but more concise phrase 'half' instead of something more wordy like 'one third of' or 'a quarter of.' i really can't remember which...


i have the perfect solution! you could borrow mari's orange ear plugs! that way you could sleep while your roommates watch 24! speaking of 24, we finished...on to season 4.

and, good gravy, there's no connection. the link is between my REMEMBERING and WRITING about the smallness of our house (and thus being unable to watch 24) and not writing naughty questions.