animals and beer [1]

penguins in a bar-top congo line might be an okay beer commercial. especially if everyone else in the room seemed fairly ordinary. actually, i bet its been done before. if not penguins, than perhaps monkeys, mice, or some other photogenic critter. however, the good thing about penguins is that, even when drunk, they don't smoke or make much noise. elephants, on the otherhand, tend to light up at every opportunity. okay, maybe a foggy memory of Dumbo doesn't merit slander of the entire elephant kingdom (but it does feature a carousing scene with circus beasts sucking down cigarettes and beer, right?), but they definitely aren't beer commerical material. that's not to say that elephants don't appreciate a good drink -- they just don't fit too well in the local neighborhood pub. besides, rob, a visiting zimbabweeen, claims that elephants have plenty of alcohol on the open range; they don't need a lucrative contract from budweiser. apparently, there's an african fruit that can actually make elephants drunk...and it grows on trees! let the mass exodus to africa begin!