vocab (mccarthy style from the back page)

today a facebook friend told me that he loves jane eyre because of charlotte bronte's interesting use of punctuation. and then, in a seemingly unrelated incident, another friend commented on the story that i wrote about my encounter with a man and his paradox finding device. not to gloat, but she gave me a very big compliment on the piece; she wrote, "Andrew I love this! And, by the way, you sound like...cormac mccarthy. I'm serious." i was feeling very happy, but then i remembered that this particular 17 point scale fan didn't enjoy reading cormac mccarthy. hmm...

anyway, it just so happens that i have a post that i've been meaning to publish on punctuation and cormac mccarthy, and the conversion of these two incidents seems like the sign that i've been waiting for. it is time.

over the course of my blogging career i've written several entries under the heading of "back page." these were blog posts that borrowed their text from the postscripts of occasional wisdom and much long-winded, overblown verbosity that i scribbled in the back pages of the novels that i recently finished reading. although i like the idea of the "back page" posts, i have since stopped writing in my novels, which makes the simple transcription from book to internet nearly impossible. thus, i am phasing out the "back page" posts and using this post as something of a transition...

xii.
THE BORDER TRILOGY, books 1 and 2

all the pretty horses by cormac mccarthy
the crossing by cormac mccarthy

critical accolades:
all the pretty horses won the national book award and the national book critics circle award.

less official acclaim:
greg wolfe, editor of image, has repeatedly described cormac mccarthy as one of the greatest american writers, and the crossing as cormac's greatest novel.

the 17 point scale concurs:
these are my favorite books of 2007, and cormac mcarthy is my favorite author of 2006 and 2007. he is the master of the dark, thoughtful novel of hope. his characters occupy a strange space between passion and stoicism, and his landscapes are quietly authentic.

but i'll spare you a mccarthy lovefest. instead, i'll bludgeon you with another andrew favorite, grammar.

as i was reminding myself about the plots of all the pretty horses and the crossing, i stumbled upon a new word: polysyndeton.

yes, apparently, cormac writes using polysyndeton. i knew this, i've just never put a name to it. he writes of a man walking and stooping and brushing the blood from a horse's hoof. cormac is stylistically spare--he shuns question marks, semicolons, and the ever-helpful quotation mark--but in my attempt at cormacian polysyndeton, you'll note a superfluous and. that's because polysyndeton is the deliberate use of several unnecessary conjunctions in close succession. i've called it the literary and but polysyndeton is probably a more universal term. in any case, passages like this are the bread and butter of mccarthy. they subtly slow down the text and thereby help communicate a sense of quiet. they also a have a distinctly biblical feel.

if you're not mccarthy, you probably write using syndeton or a single conjunction.

or perhaps you're crazy. perhaps you write using asyndeton, that is, the deliberate omission of conjunctions altogether. you know, little jewels like: i came, i saw, i blogged.

(and then i stopped blogging for several months because i was so busy working for that great shining star of online awesomeness, the other journal.)

back page: blood meridian or the evening redness in the west

xii.

blood meridian or the evening redness in the west by cormac mccarthy**

12/27/07
according to bauercount.com, jack bauer, the protagonist of 24, has killed 185 people over the course of six seasons. yet the glanton gang of mccarthy's blood meridian could teach bauer some things about killing; they eclipse this feat without the benefit of automatic weapons, and because mccarthy writes so matter-of-factly of violence and brutality (not because of the sheer number of murders), these indian scalpers make bauer seem like a harmless saint nick. biblical commentators speak of the earth groaning as it awaits the expulsion of darkness, and no novel offers a grimmer account of the pulsing menace of humanity (and our complicity with satan and, for that matter, nature) than blood meridian (not even the road). read it if you dare.

14 out of 17*

*the 17 point scale panel of experts--andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, andrew, and, yes, andrew--rated blood meridian between 13 and 16 and have yet to formally declare their rating tried and true. they still have some thinking to do.

**i think the cormac mccarthy lemonade is flooding hollywood. i just read that ridley scott will be directing blood meridian. i can't imagine how this could be filmed tastefully yet with profundity. do dark, dark, bloody epics translate well to film?

back page: an american tragedy

xi.
an american tragedy by theodore dreiser

5/1/2007
let me quote you from my edition's afterword: "the action of the novel moves like a series of waves, each surging forward to a peak of tension and receding into quietness, and each, after the first one, reenacting in a more complex and perilous fashion the material of its predecessor."

i heartily agree, but while iriving howe suggests that the gathering storm of dreiser's prose is something to be admired, i think i'd rather stay ashore. an american tragedy pounds the reader with wave after wave of its protagonists indiscretions. eight hundred fourteen pages of boring breakers. can someone please call an editor? dreiser's relentless descriptions of the blindly selfish age in which he lived make one tired. for those that survive the deluge, the novel concludes with an interesting collision between faith and conscience. ultimately, i'd say this is the kind of book that inane teachers will assign to their unfortunate students, forever spoiling the next generation's opportunity to appreciate great literature.

6 out of 17


andrew david. "dreiser won't save you, grab the rope!" crescent bar, wa.

back page: the master and margarita

x.
the master and margarita by mikhail bulgakov
translated by michael glenny

4/12/07
some masterpiece--this book stinks. the master and margarita was the worst experience of my recent trip to belize. its fantastical plot reminds me of some of the tales my buddy adam and i wrote in junior high. its funky, disjointed style reminds me of chesterton's the man who was thursday. and its ceaseless chaotic pouncing of immortal crazies on squeamish muscovites reminds me of the sadistic violence of tom and jerry with a slice of greek mythology. i'd like to blame this mess on the translator, but some parts of the book were actually rather good. if you choose to read this book, skip to the creative retellings of the life of jesus, judas, and pilate.

3 out of 17

i should mention that (1) the critics love this book, (2) rebecca the internationally-minded legal counselor-in-training loves this book, and (3) if you don't mind messy senseless plots, people say there's a meaningful satire here.


andrew david. "the wise mennonite grinds the master and margarita into the hard grassy slope." san ignacio town, belize.

back page: the brothers k

IX.
the brothers k by david james duncan

7/22/05
"...maybe i don't like perfect circles...in any case, i apologize for casting a shadow over this otherwise brilliant achievement. after all, i think [that the brothers k is] quite capable of casting its own shadows. david james duncan's characters are crazy extremes, yet he somehow makes them so believable and life-like that their suffering is contagious (beware). duncan also invents new twists to common language (metaphors) that open his world to us in a funny, unique way."

according to my myspace page, the brothers k is my favorite novel. i love it. if you like stories that address issues of faith, philosopy, baseball, the pacific northwest, family, love, politics, nature, war, mental health, or redemption, then you must read the brothers k. now. stop reading this blog; you are wasting time that could be spent reading the brothers k, the best book on the planet.

go forth and read.

andrew david. "river teeth" banff/jasper national park, alberta.
(incidentally, river teeth is a journal of creative nonfiction that is edited by david james duncan.)

back page: heart of darkness

VIII.
heart of darkness by joseph conrad

8/12/01
"powerful descriptions drive these dark tales into picturesque dead-ins, as i can't manage to grasp the central themes in any meaningful or real way."

one of my favorite schizophrenia researchers is sean meichle. i've heard girls (i.e., kate simpson and kris purganan) refer to sean as metrosexual, but in my book he's a rather typical guy's guy. he's a tennis-shoes and jeans ally in my quest for casual work dress; he's an espn regular and a loyal hawks fan; and he prefers dominoes pizza to that crappy real italian nonsense that they serve you at tuta bella. however, there is one odd thing about sean--he can't handle used books. now this isn't necessarily a feminine trait, but when sean spots an old book he reacts like beth to bugs. the taste, touch, or smell of a used book is enough to make him jump. as a lover of all things cheap (and books), this is tough for me to understand. a used book is a loved book. it's a book with character. and in this sense, i love my books more than most folks. indeed, if you visit my library in greenwood, you will find that i scribble all over my books. even when i'm lost (like the first time i read heart of darkness), i still ink 'em up. anyway, for some strange reason (known as practical crit with chris chaney) back in 2003 i transcribed many of my heart of darkness comments in a Word file. so, thanks to the internet, if you have book ocd like sean, you can now see what it's like to read one of my used books without freaking out. just follow this heart of darkness link.

back page: play it as it lays

VII.
play it as it lays by joan didion

8/10/03
"a dirty depressing book that makes me sad for those who believe in nothing (or even an erroneous something). if i want to read about nothing, i think i prefer virginia woolf."

there's a chance that didion did intendion a reaction very similar to my 2003 post-script. the moral of the story may very well be "don't be dirty, believe in something, and read virginia woolf"--well, probably not that last part--or you too will play the lead part in some depressing book from the '70s. it's the requiem for a dream approach: make it (drugs, self-centered moral corruption, whatever your poison) look cool and then mercilessly mash your characters into the dark night of reality, twist that thing (drug, corruption, etc) 180 degrees so that it destroys the protagonists and everyone she knows. and do it graphically. then anyone who reads your book, sees your movie, or hears your dream will think, "there's no way i'll ever do that."

there's also a chance that didion was just telling a story, a story that i apparently found hopeless and without merit. i shared a bit of this didion dislike over coffee with an old english professor of mine. dr. reinsma stopped mid-sip and stared. he then steered the conversation to other matters. it was as if he dismissed my dismissal as the lunacy of a sleepy, inattentive reader. still, despite ms. didion's motives or dr. reinsma's dissension (which may very well be a misattribution on my part; perhaps the good old prof had a coffee curd caught in his throat or was world-weary and tired of discussing such depressing books), i still recommend leaving as it lays where it lays. if you spot it in the $1 barrel, leave it there, that's where it belongs.

beth the s.o. "the dirty depraved one visits a cracking globe at the united nations" nyc, ny.

by the way, my association between "nothing" and virginia woolf is related to her novel to the lighthouse, in which the book goes on and on and on and on but nothing ever seems to happen. however, i was probably hoping to suggest that the nothingness in va woolf was somehow an acceptable, reading-worthy nothingness.

back page: cherry

VI.
cherry by mary karr

10/19/04
"yet another 'messed up girl grows up' memoir. i think it left me feeling sentimental and that 'cherry'-- [i think that's the main character]-- is really missing the point (of life). i guess i [just] find it hard to relate to her. it may have been well written [it seems that i was afraid to say one way or another] and includes some objectionable content."

i rarely mark on the front or back covers of books. it's unsightly and somehow discourteous. however, after concluding cherry i apparently felt free to scribble messages to past reviewers:

frank mccourt: "she's a poet and there are passages in her writing that glitter."
andrew david: "i probably agree."
sunday times: "...she writes with wonderful exactness and candour about sexual experiment and girlish desire."
andrew david: "...and this is probably why i don't relate."
caroline gascoigne: "this frank account of a wild texas girlhood is the most unbeatable read of the year...."
andrew david: "this frank account of a messed up texas girl is...."

if you read my blog as closely as i do, you'll notice that my book reviews tend to appear in alphabetical order by author's last name. today marks the end of that tradition. after unknowingly bumping into karr last week, i felt it was only fitting to conclude her time on this blog with a back page review. as my editorial marks attempt to highlight [i.e., these boxy brackets, the pesky pets of overly attentive editors], i didn't have much to say about this book. i'd just finished janet fitch's white oleander, so i was on troubled-girl-overload. still, i wonder if my response would change had i known that karr was a recent (?) convert to catholicism. would i have embarked on a wild goose chase, searching for a subtle message of redempton whereby i could exclaim, "ah hah! i told you she was a christian"? would i at least find some nugget to dissuade me of karr's pointless vision of life? maybe one of you will read it and tell me...

andrew david. 'wimps die 1 & 2' yelapa, mexico.
the guidebooks claim that there are no roads in or out of yelapa. however, any andrewesque wanderer who journies beyond the cemetary, up a dusty trail, and past the occasional clothes line may find a most marvelous sight: a nonexistent road. and maybe, if this window is particularly portentious, one may find this same vehicle, still waiting the return of its daring dead owner.

back page: notes from underground

V.
notes from underground by fyodor dostoevsky

7/9/03
"starts slow, ends fast. sometimes as i drown in the underground intellectual rants, i wonder if there's anything to these tirades that i read over and over again, searching wildly for some meaning. powerful soliloquy. drama."

as the title might suggest, notes from underground is a rather slim work. still, it's a bit of a puzzle. in fact, i might have to titrate down my daily dose of risperidone if i hope to empathize with dostoevsky's narrator. ah, yes. this is what i love about russian literature: the unsettling character sketches of the lonely and less than lucid. maybe i'm with modest mouse and steve van selus on this one: "i like songs about drifters [e.g., crazy russian blokes], books about the same / they both seem to make me feel a little less insane."

in any case, i'm back from nyc. i promise to share photos from my visit to the big apple soon. it was a blast! matt and jacinda are truly gifted at sharing their lives (and city) with others. they are amazing hosts.

sooooo...i've got a lot of great things planned for the 17 point scale (i.e., don't laugh, but i have several blog drafts in progress), but i might be a bit slow in uploading those changes...


andrew david. 'mysterious bathroom guest.' yelapa, mexico.

this bugger is apparently known as a canclo.

back page: albert camus & bruce chatwin

IV.
an even more abbreviated version
(and please note that the title of this post consists of author names rather than book titles)

4/78 the plague (albert camus) - guest reviewer: hubbert
in the face of absurdity, how do men act? the doctor: fight the absurdity of being a healer. grand: the sentence.

ca. 2/2/01 the plague (albert camus) - alright. i'm back.
a dark, thought rendering book set forth in typical camus style. [random relevant camus quote: 'they had become allergic to hope']

ca 12/00 caligula and three other plays (albert camus)
strange....ah, yes, camus.

9/16/02 the stranger (albert camus)
crazy. finds hope in hopelessness. i wonder what happens to the stranger...

5/22/02 oldfield park, bath, england in patagonia (bruce chatwin)
hmm...I'll have to think on this (and meanwhile visit patagonia)....he [chatwin] finds amazing intrigue [and, as i note elsewhere in the book, ridiculousness and sadness] in stories that might otherwise seem boring archaeology


andrew david 'the jungle saint' puerto vallarta, mexico.

back page: the sacred journey

III.
the sacred journey: a memoir of early days by frederick buechner

2/23/04
"so...having not read much 'non-fiction' for fun, i'm not sure what to say. how 'bout this: freddy's definitely found his 'voice.' at times his writing style seems deceptively simple, even hypnotic. he has done a masterful job at piecing his memories together into a meaningful (and, in rare places, preachy) message. in fact, he provides a first-rate example of how to do [exactly] what he suggests, [an example of how to] pour over our pasts for surprising glimpses of God's grace-filled touch....see page 7"

page 7: "wow, beth, you're right. if nothing else, he sure knows how to write a stirring introduction."

by the way, if you follow the link, you may find a little blurb by dr. doug thorpe, english professor at seattle pacific university (and an equally stunning shorter version of my blurb. actually, i feel a bit self -conscious about posting sucky 3 sentence reviews on amazon, but oh well. i think its actually helpful. who really has time to read an entire paragraph?).


andrew david 'daddy, its a tourist; can i feed him?' puerto vallarta, mexico, day 3?

back page: corelli's mandolin

II.

corelli's mandolin: a novel by louis de bernieres

12/7/03
"this novel will always [fondly] remind me of nickel creek...once i adjusted to the onstensibly grandiose vocabulary, this was a fun, touching, and (perhaps) epic tale of love, war, and GREECE. i like it, and on the eve of rhett and vanessa's wedding i wish them a love like p&a."

hmmm...when i alighted upon the back page concept, i didn't anticipate the necessity of a fill-in-the-missing-colors post-script to every single back page post-script. oh, well.

first, i should warn readers that this connection between nickel creek and corelli's mandolin is not entirely natural. indeed, they are separated by an ocean, several decades in scope, and an obvious lack of any specific thematic similarity. still, as you might be surprised to learn, music plays an important role in the story of corelli's mandolin. moreover, nickel creek caught the coat-tails of fame as a result of chris thile's nimble mandolin pickin' fingers; did you catch that? mandolin. in any case, to manufacture a similar reading experience, i recommend donning your imagination cap and listening to the pseudo-greek tunes of nickel creek and this side.

from a meta-blog perspective you may note that i appear to use the term 'touching' a bit too frequently in these reviews. earlier i claimed that henderson rain king had a 'touching style.' however, rather than assuming that andrew has a recycle bin vocabulary, lets try optimism. perhaps he's merely a great critic; perhaps once you whittle away all the competing camps of literary theory, the most tangible characteristic of good literature is its ability to touch readers.

back to the review at hand. i'm afraid that the inclusion of a sappy marital blessing may have little personal application to someone debating whether or not to read this book. on the other hand, when bernieres happens upon my blog, i suspect that he'll feel quite honored (and that is, after all, my aim -- to suck up to british authors). personally, i'd be all aglow if someone referenced my blog in a wedding context (see my great poem 'command' for laudable wedding toast material). for readers other than bernieres, i hope that the inclusion of a wedding blessing could at least produce a bit of intrigue. who is this vanessa? you might ask. and who is this rhett? are there any other names that start with rh? rhiannon...rhodes (but that's a last name)...rhoda....

finally, do NOT judge this book based upon the movie. you see, the book does NOT star nicholas cage. as an aside, i was just googling for a page that said "HE'S AN IDIOT!" in big block letters. while unsuccessful, i found this adorable website. if you click no other links in your life, please click this one. mr cage, this one's for you!

back page: henderson the rain king

I.
henderson the rain king by saul bellow

"wow! great book. it started really slow and i nearly gave up, but it ended with touching style and a great big dose of the bizarre. in the end, i think it finds redemption, or at least hope. wow..."

i plan to navigate my library alphabetically, and, as you can see, sometimes the reviews will be quite brief, more like afterthoughts than afterwords. for shorter posts like this, i would be happy to say more if anyone is actually interested in the book. by the way, amazon refers to this novel as a 'seriocomic' work. i guess that's newspeak for tragicomedy.

state of the scale address

four months down. i kind of like this blogging thing, but i hope its not too stressful for my girlfriend. one of these days i'm afraid she'll snap 'NO! i didn't read your blog today! i'm dating you, not your blog. now, leave me in peace and stop asking about your stupid blog...'

upcoming blogs:
1. on the road reviews - these posts will hopefully bear the fruit of my most dangerous new idea (and perhaps my sole idea) concerning that i-5 stretch of verdant wasteland between seattle and portland. the recipe for my new idea is really quite simple; in fact, it only takes a few key ingredients: one or more full length music albums, a device with which to play said cds, a pen, and a post-it note pad. the stickies that survive the ride shall then serve as the song-by-song foundation for my 'on the road reviews.' as an aside, i suddenly (as in a few minutes ago) became intensly interested in origins. that is, where did this idea come from? (i don't know). why did i choose this title? (to begin, i did not intend hurtle my way into the company of jack kerouac or willy nelson. in fact, having never finished 'on the road' or listened to the verses of 'on the road again,' i can't even claim an artistic birthright to their sense of these words, so there is no connection. none. i liked the aliteration; that's it).

2. back page reviews - or, as everyday sam might say, little tiny book reviews. in this case, the title is an allusion to my bookcase (or, more aptly, the treasures within that bookcase). you see, for the past several years, it has been my habit to scrawl a brief afterword in the final pages of my books. thus, for now i am envisioning 'back page reviews' to be ten second showers: refreshingly brief responses to books, books, and more books.

add:

3. gre joy - that is, since the blog's byline alludes to a graduate entrance exam, perhaps its finally about time to expose the world to the delightful world of the gre. this may come in the way of literature terms, author bios, or literary excerpts.

4. in the kitchen - a segment devoted to cooking tips and party planning.

:add

other news.
1. well, it has come time to break the illusion that a nameless entity rests behind the 17 point scale. hi, everyone. in case you haven't already gathered, my name is andrew. i tend to write this blog when not wearing any pants. that's because its generally right before i go to bed. as a result of the late hour, i sometimes write odd things that are barely relevant (like 'i tend to write this blog when not wearing any pants'). this is unfortunate and may reflect poorly on my writing. however, from this point forward, if you see contextually strange quotes, song titles of my current itunes playlist, or links at the very bottom of an entry, please do not assume that i intended even the foggiest of connections to the preceeding text. instead, consider them unrelated post-scripts. (ah hah! perhaps i will denote such 'irrelevant material' with an asterisk or some other character).


*And That Right Soon (from Shawshank Redemption soundtrack)
by the way andrew, who's everyday sam?